...the truth is you could slit my throat...

A MESSAGE FROM OUR FEARLESS LEADER

Mon, 16 Aug 2004 06:08:25 GMT

Oh, woe. Yes, our beloved Laura is fake, and, once I press 'Update', she will be dead. On June 28th, 2003, my sidekick and I created Laura out of boredom. She did not meet my expectations, and since we've both been bored with her for a long time, we've finally decided to pull the plug. I've actually been planning to at least get in a crappy emo poem or two before this, but it just plain never happened.
Seeing as I sucked badly at this, and the popularity of troll journals has declined, I'll not try again. It was fun while it lasted- we even threw a little party when we hit 1000 comments.
Apologies to all the people I offended under the guise of Laura, I didn't mean it. I just thought, "What would Laura say?" Except for you emo people. I really fucking hate emo people.

I would like to thank the following:
1. My sidekick. Couldn't have done it without you!
2. Bubba, for being so damn sawft 'n' cuddly
3. And you, the viewers, for being such horrible sports ;)

And now, a message from my fearless sidekick:

Yeah, it's fake, oh well. It got boring. "What was the point?" you ask? "Why are you such losers that you made a fake lj?" "What gives you the right to make fun of people like that?" I don't fucking know and I don't fucking care. It was fun in the beginning ya know? Ok well I don't really have anything to say. Cheers.
-the otha' half.

PS- Thanks to whoever should be thanked. Later.

Sat, 31 Jul 2004 03:18:13 GMT

Y WONT U ASSWHOLES TAKE ME OF UR FUKKIN FREINDS LIST GOD

Thu, 22 Jul 2004 03:22:12 GMT

ok all i wanna kno is WTF ARE ALL U FUKKIN PPL DOIN ON MY FUKKIN 'FRIEND OF' LIST?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!!?!?!? HOW THE HELL DID U ALL FIND MY USERNAME AN Y DID U ADD ME?????

i thik all of u all should go take me off ur friend list RIGHTNOW cuz i dunno any of u an i dont wanna b on ur list!!

!!!~EDIT~!!!
OK I NEVER ADD NEONE S UR ALL FUKKIN LYIN STOP TELLIN ME THAT I ADDED U 1ST CUZ I DIDNT

kthxbye

ugh!!!

Mon, 12 Jul 2004 14:41:49 GMT

ummmm so yea i been getin into a lot of "e-fights"(LOL amnderz...) an it one point i started typin all correct-grammer-like so ppl would take me serously.. an they STILL called me fake WTF is that?? wtf did i do to you ppl 2 make you hate me damn much??
well yea w/e.. im just gonna type however the hell i feel like from nwo on an if you dont like it HERES AN IDEA GO AWAY jackasses

o yea i ditched the riotgrrl s/n an my new one is lonelyblackroze yea i kno im cool LOL

an im gonna cont w/ any of the e-fights im in right now im gonna stop feedin trolls from now on!!!

4th of july is GAY

Mon, 05 Jul 2004 20:53:21 GMT

omg i just woke up....... neway yesterday was the 4th of july oo big deal....i had 2 get up early and go to sum gay picnic or somethin with my family then we came home n i went over manderz house. we waited for bethy and tim and jo to show up... we just chilled on her back porch and went in the pool for a bit but i dident bring a bathing suit so0 i had 2 borrow sum clothes from manda lol. neway after taht we had sum drinks and watched the fireworks it was so pretty but i was sad b/c i didnt hav anyone to be with.... n then beth and tim hooked up and it reminded me of when i had mark, i was being emo ...o well marks an asshole i hope he dies.

then i went home and cried 4 a lil while n talked to ken online, i think i like him, i think he mite like me 2.......oo well hes prob just tryin to brake my heart like mark did. GUYS ARE ALL ASSHOLES

ok well i g2g now i think im gonna chill at the mall later if ne1 ever picks up the god damn phone oii.. byebbye

</3*laUra*</3

... .:.ThE ReTuRn oF tHe LaUrA.:. ...

Tue, 29 Jun 2004 03:18:12 GMT

hey every1, im back!! an by no means better than ever...
before the end of the skoolyear like all my freinds ditched me for like NO REASON AT ALL...
so to all the people i added(an furute people im gonna add...): i add cuz i think your interesting an i want you to be my freind...

its all too complicated for me to explain... maybe later?

in other news HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY LJ!!! one great year of me updating the world on my life, and putting up with you rude bastards in the process! and heres to hopin ill still be alive by the next year!

happy vday...

Sat, 14 Feb 2004 20:29:14 GMT

well its vday today... n i jus realized that im not over mark liek at all.... i miss him sooooooo much... y did he have to dump me? he said he wast ready 4 a "SeRiOuS RElAsHiNsHiP" n that he 'dIdNt WaNnA hUrT mE'.... WEL GUESS WAT U DID HURT ME U STUPID SHIT N ILL NEVER 4GIVE U N ILL NEVER EVER GET OVER IT....

leahs out w/ her bf doing god knows wat n jessy prolley out eating some dyke out.... at least SHES got some1...

o well. jackie n jen r comin over 2 cheer me up later were gonna watch mOvIeZ r sumthin like that... im glad theyre tryin 2 cheer me up n stuff, but i dont think theyll ever understnad wat im goin thru.... theyre so HaPpY n stuff all the time i hope they dont ever kno wat kinda PaIn that i feel every day of my life...

i jus dont feel liek i fit in w/ my freindz sumtimes.... i dont think i belonmg anywear really... :'(

~*~LaUrA~*~

woahh its been 4evr

Sun, 01 Feb 2004 15:47:07 GMT

heyy every1....its been like a year since i updated this thing practicly lol newayz i 4got about mark already hes so gay!!! i lyke this 1 kid now but i cant say who cuz i no1 relly knoz yet cept lyke maNda but other peepz read this n i dun want them 2 kno......
ummmmmmmmm wat else is nEw? lolol omg on new yrz eve me leah jackIe maNda jeff bob n mike (dif mike) went out 2 dinner then to mIkes house (no 1 was home) n got drunk lololol it wuz pretty kewl....i told my rents i wuz sleepin ova JackIez n watchin a movie she got her older sis 2 cover 4 us her sis is awsum!!

OMG i so0o0o0o flunked all my midtermz!!! they were so0o hard.....llyke wayyyy harder then the first time!!1 o well i dun care much lol my mom will kick my a$$ if she finds out tho ill figuer sumthin out.....
neway heres wat i did this weekend:
friday i went up 2 franklin milLz wit mAnda jeff jake lisa n jen it was sooo much fun. i got sum new shoes (DCs) n the mest CD....after that we went back 2 lisas n shyt,...i got wit jake!!1.....then me n jen went 2 mandas n slept over..yesterday we stayed in n watched moviez until around 7 we went 2 mcdolands lol...

duno0o wat im doin 2day jus sittin here wit jen were gonna make sum plans soon... ok well more l8r!

omgomgomgomgomg :'(:(:(:(:(:(:(:(:((:(:

Sat, 06 Dec 2003 18:14:15 GMT

OMG MARK JUS DUMPED ME I CANT BELEIVE THIS LIFE OFICIALY SUCKS MY COCK OMG
mark hates me n my moms a bitch n my dads a bastard n there is no god omg i fuckin hate my life i wish i would die this isnt fuckin fair y cnt nething go rite??? leah has a bf y cant i?? im liek 9999999 times hottter than her...
omg i fell like slitting my wrists omg well ok im gonna go cry now ill c yall l8er if i havent killed myself....

~*~laura~*~

Thu, 20 Nov 2003 02:29:13 GMT

Hey every1, sry i havent written in a while.....

nuthin muchhas happen since my last entry accept that ppl finally stopped commentin in my lj!! LoLz leah sed "mayb they all decided to grow the fuck up" hahaha...
neway i didn go out last weekend cuz i got a cold, i was out sick monday n came back yestersay. i still feel like crap, but mom n dad dont want me to miss too much skool.
durin lunch today cait n jessy came to our table n asked if they could "talk things out w/ us... me n leah said wed think about it. lead said we should tell them well meet them n not show up. itd b funny cuz theyd look real dumb.... i dunno tho. i think im startin 2 feel bad about wat happened., i mean jessy doesnt seem 2 changed since she told us, but still i think id feel really unconfortable around her n stuff.
ill think about it. i g2g take a shower n finish my hw. l8er!

~*~LaUrA~*~

so0o much fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

Sun, 09 Nov 2003 17:22:42 GMT

hEy every1..... i havent up8ed this tihng in lyke 4EVER lol...... ok so heres wats been goin on:

omg i think i twas 10-24 .......

GC CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

omg it was GREAT!!! lol i went w/.. manda, jaCkie n jake. mest n goldfinger were there 2... tehy were great mest played drawing bored!!! omg i LUV that song!! tony is so0o hot hehe n goldfinger was good 2 there lyke jakes fav band..
but GC were the best!!! b4 they played jake sed he heard sum1 say "hey look theres chris from gc!" n we looked but we didnt see nothin.... o well thats ok i dun really kno wat he looks liek but jackie sed she did so0o0 w/e...... we saw jen n jeSs (not the gay 1) there 2 that was kool.

neways besides that nothin happend realy i gotta study 4 tests n stuff n i think im gonna hang out w/ jackie 2day...... l8r

GEOMETRY CAN KISS MY @$$ (LoLz LeAh!!!!!!!!11)

Thu, 23 Oct 2003 20:00:08 GMT

heyyyyy every1...................
ummmmm this weeks been really boring, i havent hung out at all this week...... last week i jus went 2 the s8park n nuthin happened therre....

i gotta go to hw, bye bye!!

~*~LaUrA~*~

omg

Thu, 16 Oct 2003 22:13:31 GMT

hEy every1.. omg i just realized taht jessy(homo)s bro is john prob gay 2!!1 remember when i sed that b4? omg i bet i wuz rite...... cuz he liek wearz tite pantz n shyt n talks weird n he spendz like an hour to do hiz hair in the morning. he takez like longer than his sister. o well w/e hez dirrty 2 he still shops at all dem thrift stores that liek only poor people buy stuff at...

w.e thank GOD my speakers work now!!!!!!!!1 omg i almost DIED i didnt hav music 2 listen 2 lol..... newayz nothin relly new.... i hung out w/ leah n jason at jasonz block the other nite n mark<3 stopped by but my moms gay n she made me go in at liek 10:30 cuz its a skool nite wtf how gay is that??????/ o well. ight i guess thats it im gonna find out 2morrow what were doin this weekend i havent been 2 the skatepark in like 4ever. we gotta chill..... mike sez hes gonna come out i havent seen him in so0o0o long. o.k well w.e i g2g do my gay ass h.w now...

*LaUrA*!

Tue, 07 Oct 2003 21:58:49 GMT

omg. 2day after skool jessy asked 2 talk 2 me leah n cate in provate... she came out 2 us!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111 she GaY!!!!!!!!! omg i cant beleive this... n she sez she likes leah! how GrOsS is THAT??!?! leah just caled her a dike n went hmoe, cate sez she duznt care n is still freinds w/ her... i duno wat 2 think. i left w/ leah.
i dont kno.... they both been my bffs since kindergarden, n if i stay kool w/ jessy shell stop bein freinds w/ me... n jessys alwats been their 4 me, but wat if she hits on me?? that would b so0o0o0o wrong n nasty... i think im gonna stay freins w/ leah. i guess me n jessy n cate wont b freinds nemore, but thats ok, besides i got tonzzzzzz of OtRo AmIgAs LoLz i take EsPaNoL...
well im out, we hav a lot of tests 2 morrow n i cant hav the dike n the looser distracking me!!
l8er!

~*~LaUrA~*~

Sun, 28 Sep 2003 01:22:21 GMT

hey every1. sry i havent update l8ly, i got a lot of h/w n shyt. that n i been hangin w/ my grrlz! LoLz
yesterday i want 2 go 2 the north dance, but mark didnt wanna go so we ended pu just hangin out instead.
nuttin else is happein cuz of borin @ss skool! LoLz my social study teacher makes the WoRsT calls EvEr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111 hes such a dork he sez he has a g/f but we all kno he is SO a virgin LoLz

o well. i hav nuthin else 2 right about now. ;8er pplz!!

~*~LaUrA~*~

IM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111

Sun, 21 Sep 2003 23:50:49 GMT

LoLz im back b/c my parents ungroundd me b/c i was bein good! plus i got 100 on my history quiz!!!!!!
hehehehehe this means i get 2 go 2 teh GC concert!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 im so0o0o0o0o excited
omgomg i get 2 c mark after skool 2 morroow mayb! yyyyyaaayyyyyyyyy!!!!!!
llz skools o.k. i got lunch w/ leah so its kool. mu classes r like easy as fuk! LoLz well im gonna go call mark n c if he can meet me after skool 2 morrow! l8er!

~*~LaUrA~*~

y0

Mon, 15 Sep 2003 18:48:21 GMT

hey every1!!!!! wats up?? lol im in teh skool libary now s0o0o im updatin real quick!! umm n0thin new really....... o yea!! omg GC is comin 2 philly n manda got tix!!!!!!!11 omg she sayd if my mom wiLl let me out by then i can go wit her!!!! omg i am SO excited lolz...
newayz i heard my rents talkin bout maybe un-gRoundin me from the comp earli since ive been doin good n not givin em trouble n shyt so thatz great.....i bet they wouldent if they knew i go on here @ skool lol
i haveNt talked 2 mark in 4ever!!!! but i got a plan hehe im gonna tell my parentz i hav a full day next time i get a half day n go meet mark after skool.. omg i miss im SO much i hope he doesent dump me cuz i nevr see him.....i dont tihnk he will cuz hez nicer than taht.

o.k. ttyl
*lAuRa*

Mon, 08 Sep 2003 18:32:58 GMT

heyyyyyyyyyyyy every1!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im at my skool libary! i told mymom im herre doin stuff 4 skool... im such a ReBeL LoLzzzzz........ newayz
yea skool SUX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11 it is so0o0o0o gay... i cant wait til halloween imma go trick or treatin w/ my grrlz! o yea! leah got a lj now! her sn on here is jasonz-gurlie... but ppl r coments there 2! how gay is taht??
so yea mark called me a few times when dad was at work, n mom helps out at sum skool or sumthin thats when i talk 2 mark on teh phone n answer coments here....... plus they been goin 2 bed around 10or11 l8ly i dunno y.....
oo well i g2g now b4 the libarian stats wonderin wat im doin....... l8er!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mon, 25 Aug 2003 02:48:17 GMT

heyYyYYyy ever!!!!!!!11
i made a new icon in dollzmakerz n i made it my icon... itz supoosed 2 look like me!! LoLz
newayz... my parents r out at dinner "dis cusing" my behavier l8ly......
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!11111 im grounded until teh end of the Sk0oL YeAr!!!!!!!!!111 HoW mUcH DoEs THAT sUcK?!?!?!!?
omg they grounded me cuz i told them they ShOuLd b shot!!!!!! its so0o0o0o0o0o unfaur cuz its TRUE!!!! omg i hate them so0o0o much... i hope they get in a accident on the way home!!!! they would b great cuz then i wouldnt b grounded nemore.... o well im not supposed 2 b on the comp until xmas n im not aloud out now til halloween.... my mom is such a stupid cunt!!!!!!! omg i fukkin ahte her!!!!!!!!111 omg well i gtg b4 they get home l8er!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111

omg...!!!!

Thu, 21 Aug 2003 23:17:57 GMT

hey every1.. omg i hate my parents!! there so0o mean, mark called me teh other day an my mom pikced up (shes such a easedropper) n shes like "o whos this mike?" n hes like "no its mark from the sk8park" n he said he wanted 2 take me out somwhere n she said i coudnt. she yelled @ me for dating cuz she sayz im n ot aloud 2 date til in 18!!! omg can u believe it?! 18!! how will i survive til then??? i wont!!! she talked 2 my dad n they grounded me!!!!!!!! omg i hate them so0o0o much!!! now i cant get out for a month!! yea i dont believe it tho theyll let me out b4 that.

they said i cant use the phone for 2 weeks n the comp for 1 week but they aint home so i snuck on. im gonna get off inna sec n call manda n tell her wut happened! every1 else can c it on herre.

newayz... uhmm b4 taht happend i did get 2 c mark once hez so cute n nice he opens the door 4 me n shyt lolz.. n he likes alot of teh music i do. im gonna call him after this

l8a

xoxo*LaUrA*oxox

i h8 my comp!

Mon, 18 Aug 2003 21:35:07 GMT

*oMg* i this BIg LoNgEnTrY ready n this peace of shyt comp fucks up on me!!!!!!! omg i hate this comp so0o0o0o much...

newayz, i went 2 franklinmills mall w/ jessy and leah(they feel better!!!!) on sat. n baught PiNk ChUcKs!!!!!!!!!1111 i cant beleive they had pink chucks omg they r so0o0o0o awesum!!!!!!!!!!!!!
also aftrward we went 2 the sk8tpark 2 look @ cutiez n 1 of them asked me out!!! his names mark, he is so0o0o0o cute... 1 of them also asked jessy out but she sed no. i dunno y! she doesnt hav a bf now or nuthin... she sed she didnt wnat a bf now. its kool, mayb sum other time
but mark is so0o0o hawt!!!!!!hes 5'11' an hes got brown hair an blue eyez n hes skinny n got muscles. yesterday i went to watch him n friends sk8 around the block tht mark lives on. i had a lotta fun!!
i dunno wat im doin 2day, i'm gonna call 1 of my grrlz!
iits time 4 me 2 bounce!!! l8er gators(lol leah!!!)

im so0o0o0o board!!!!!!!111

Wed, 13 Aug 2003 02:08:55 GMT

heYyYyYyY!!!!111
sry i havnt updated in like 5 daze.... o well herres the scoop

teh CHINESE PPL didnt move in... sum old cople baught ti... theire mvoin in their stuf already n theyre relly nice n stuf so itz c0ol...

leah n jessy both ha the flu, n cates benn stayin in 4 the apst few days cause she has 2 read 3 books 4 skool. i already did htat last week, so i got nuthin 2 worry about!! but i got nuthin 2 do..... i'm so board!!!!!!!!111 sum1 IM me rsumthin!!!!!11111

kk now

Fri, 08 Aug 2003 03:40:04 GMT

kk sorry bout teh other day... a few wekks ago the lady who lived netx door put her house up 4 sale n 4 the past couple days a famly of like 20 chinks startid lookin @ it...htey dont even speak english!!!!11 ym dad tried 2 talk 2 them n they dint even kno wat he wasy sayong!! n their all noisy n stfuf n wont shutup!! omg if they mov in their prob gnna keep me up allllllll nite!!!!!!!11 they beter not move in!!!!!!!! omg

Mon, 04 Aug 2003 20:50:47 GMT

Heyyyyyyy ever1!!!!!!!!!!1111
kk well newayz on sat. i stayed in n wached TV, so nuthin hapened threr.....
o0o0oo but yesterday i went out w/ cait leah n jessy!! we didnt go newhere..... we jus walked arund n gotsum ice creem!!!!!1 lol it was g0od. leah gto a milksake an atfer she drank some she sneezed n it cmae out her nose!!!!!!!111 lololol it was so0o0o0o funny....
haha after taht we went n sw american weding it was funny 2 i relly liked it!!
after that cait had 2 go home n me n leah i slpt over jessy's hizzouse(lol jessy!) we styaed up until like 3AM we wrer paintin each others nails(not blakc this time!!lolz) n leah str8ned my hair she burned ym ear by acident w/ the str8ner thingy btu thats ok!! its lokks so0o0o0o cute!!!!!11 it took liek an hor tho b/c my hairs like ultra thikc......
newayz we tlaked 4 like the looooongest time n jessy talked 2 me about mike 4 like n hours n i cried n i fell so0o0o much beter now.... im over him!! so 2day mayb well go 2 themall n chekc out bois...

time 2 bouce!!!!11 l8er

ppl r so0o stUpid grrr

Sun, 03 Aug 2003 04:32:37 GMT

uh ur aLL stuoid. do u rEally think i care wut uz tHink??????

i dont. n guEss wat: i dOnt care 1 bit if u dOnt lyke hOw i type cuz i donT GiVE a shYt if i spell tHingz wrong or w/e cuz its MY JOURNAL!!!!!!!!!111 cant u PpL seem to ReAliZe taht???... w/e u suck
y caN othr pPl hav journals and no0o 1 boTherz them? i donT think im liek the oNly person who doEsnt care bOut typin and shyt
losers

anyway i wOuld make this frindsonly but mY offLine friends dont hav jOurnals s0o0o w/e........

i dId finalLy get out yesTerdAy......i weNt 2 the mAlL.. i thInk im stArtin 2 get oVr mike cUz thats ok hez aloud 2 hav crushez 2 even if it isent on me. i thInk i understnad. bUt even thO im getTin ovr it (fast 2) i sTilL feel sad..... i dunno y.... w/e.. u ppl doNt care. ur aLl jus hear 2 bothr me. U PPL SUCK!!!!!!

n i nEvr said i wuz PuNk. im nOt really labelz r lame i jUst lyke sum punK musik n i dO tend 2 gOo 4 pUnx n shyt cuz there hOtt... but yea w/e stoP tellIn me wut i am n wut im not cuz u PpL dont kno shYt about me.
PuNk is an atitude nOt a stYle or a tYpe of music!... F**K U IF U DONT LIEK ME!!!!!!! I DONT CARE IF U LIKE GC OR NOT, i do0o!!!!!111. i dOnt careif u Ppl think there pUnk or not or If there poserz w/e. lEave me alone.

ITS A FREE COUNRTY!!!!!!!!!!